“Sometimes I get tired of hearing myself talk.”

from the diary: “Wednesday 8/3/88

“My last date with Scott – last Thurs. was bust. He’d had some great revelation of how he’d been acting immature and irresponsible and had decided he’d all shape up all-of-a-sudden like that. He proceeded to talk about himself all evening with minor detours into ‘past’ loves (‘I’ll always love Anthony.’ This on a date with me.) He told me his philosophy of money; his career plans; his love needs. He even went so far as to ask me to be his mirror – ‘What impression do you get of me?’ he asked.

“At first I was diplomatic as I really dint know what to say. Finally, after he’d changed his mind about going dancing … He dint seem to want to do anything. I was, frankly, bored. And depressed. He ast if I was tired. I said, ‘No.’ Then I came out with the bad stuff about him. The ‘second’ date he’d stood me up after I’d taken the bus in to Santa Rosa especially to see him, I waited, he never showed. I called 2 days later and he apologized. Yeah. Who called? The one who did the standing up or the standee? Out of our four dates – 2 were fun & 2 were total disasters as far as I’m concerned. Diana said she went out on a date with a ‘nice guy’ and one line seemed to sum it up. He said, ‘I was never really much of a reader when I was young.’ The quip of doom.

“When I said, ‘Sometimes I get tired of hearing myself talk,’ Scott answered, ‘Oh, I never get tired of hearing myself talk.’ A few minutes later I said, just as I was about to take him home, ‘There’s a point at which I get tired of talking. And there’s a point at which I get tired of listening. There’s a point at which I get tired of listening. To you talking. About yourself.’”